It's true. I never believed it.
Standing above the corner of Clark and Balmoral, looking out at the people passing below, I was struck by the words "You can never go home again". My home has changed and it's no longer the place that has to accept me when I have no other place to go. Home is where I hang my hat; where my heart is; wherever I make it.
Right now, it feels a million miles away.
Why, why, why does Staples sell "a lot" of their freakin' Easy Buttons?
Apparently it's been a while since I've been into a Staples. Today I popped in to buy some packing tape and was unnerved to see a giant display of Easy buttons. You know the bright/shiny button from their commercials? Ya, well, apparently for ~$5-6 you can have your own Easy Button. You press it and it says "Well, that was easy". That's it. That's all it does. Why are people buying these things?
Well, maybe it's altruism. Afterall, Staples claims it's giving all proceeds to Boys & Girls Club of America. But my god, why not just drop a $5 in the mail to BGCA? Do you really need this plastic piece o'crap?
What's one family recipe that you wish you knew how to cook?
Of all the weird and random things? My dad's chicken liver. There's really nothing that I can say to explain this, but it's the one thing that I haven't figured out and I truly miss. There are lots of other things that I haven't figured out but don't really miss. This one gets me for some reason.
I was looking for something today. I couldn't remember how long ago I bought something. I remembered that I bought it via Amazon, but couldn't recall when. So I logged into my account and looked through my recent orders. Not only did I find what I was looking for, I found every order I've placed through my Amazon account since 1999. Holy crap what I timeline!
I don't remember if I was ordering from Amazon before 1999 or not, but apparently the first thing I bought under this account was a gift for my then girlfriend, Laura. Then what apparently were a couple of holiday gifts.
In 2000 I was clearly in a minimalist state (it happens!) because I ordered exactly one thing: The DVD of Heathers.
From 2001 to 2003 I was "strongly encouraged" not to spend on frivolous things. I ordered nothing. In retrospect this was an awesome thing for me. I learned how to talk myself out of buying the things I wanted just because I wanted them. But it's still strange to think that I went three solid years without buying a new DVD, book or CD.
2004 was a light year but I indulged in a single DVD, a CD (the soundtrack to Prey for Rock and Roll - shhh!) and a gift (Invader Zim - Doom, Doom, Doom)
I went to town in 2005. Feeling flush and on the rebound from a breakup in late 2004 I sought solace in stuff. Books, movies, music, gadgets. Everything from a book about the deadly heat wave in Chicago to trashy dyke television, with a stop off for a scanner mid-year.
In 2006 Amazon rolled out a new program called Amazon Prime. For $79 a year Prime allows you to get free 2 day shipping on thousands of products sold directly by Amazon. this means most books, music and movies as well as a surprising variety of other items. For an additional $3.99 per item you can get next day shipping too. Their bet is/was that customers will buy/spend more if they don't have to think about shipping costs each time.
I guess they were right in my case. I placed 20 separate orders with them totaling more than $1200 over the course of the year. Granted, I bought a digital camera for $544, but still... I took the bait. Did I come out ahead or behind? Well, arguably I lost in the deal. I spent $1200 in one year on stuff I probably could have done without. About $200 of that was gifts that would have had to be spent somewhere, but the rest of it? probably could have saved a few hundred bucks.
So, now I'm faced with whether or not I should renew my Prime membership. It's set to renew on March 20 and I just can't decide whether I should tempt myself with it or try to keep myself from buying things. Dilemmas.
Hopeful.
During a week which has found me questioning the major decisions I've made in the last couple of months I find myself feeling pretty rock solid about something I never considered possible.
I think I've shared my story for the last time.
You know the "story". The story you eventually tell to the person you're dating. The truths about yourself, your past, your weaknesses and your fears. You tell this story as kind of a "hey, you need to know this stuff about me before I get too attached to you" thing. It's an important demarcation line. If that person sticks around after the story is told you've got a shot at something. If they really take that story to heart and understand the complexity, learn from it how to "handle" you when times are tough and find a way to support you when you're about to break - well that's just an amazing thing.
She gets it. She may not always remember it, but she gets it. That's more than I ever expected.
I'm frustrated and pissy and angry. People are annoying me to no end.
At a time when I need my friends most they are proving to be colossal let downs.
If you're a local friend, chances are I'm talking about you. I'm sorry if this is the first you're learning of this, but honestly, what could you have thought? Repeated blown plans, giving me shit and grief over things I've asked you not to, unrealistic expectations and out and out avoidance.
It's okay, I got the hint. Let's call it a learning experience and move on.
Who or what do you really love?
Myself. On alternate Tuesdays.
I have this camera. I like to take photos. But I don't like to promote myself. So in the perfect world I'd take pretty photos and people would see them and they would like them, but they wouldn't necessarily know it was my work. That rarely happens.
A couple weeks ago I got the wild hair to submit a photo to JPG Magazine. It's a community driven magazine. Members vote on what gets included for each theme. So... I submitted THIS.
I may have found an apartment, in South Boston, of all places. It's a super cute one bedroom on the third floor of a row house three short blocks to the ocean. Yes, it's the ocean that sells it for me. I was shocked to find out how nice the area was. What little I knew about Southie was gleaned from hard edged films and unfortunate issues with desegregation and St. Patrick's Day parades. Apparently there's been quite the move to make the area more livable and it shows.
I've checked out the "bad" areas and feel that I can handle them. I've checked out the commute to the office and can handle it. It'll be really strange to commute at all after a year of working from home and five years of a 15 minute or less drive to work, but it's going to be fine. I've checked out the proximity of the grocery and various other amenities. That looks good. It's close to downtown and the other interesting areas of town. Two bus lines nearby for when I want to go out without wanting to drive. My only remaining concern is laundry.
It's clean, in a good area, in my price range, flexible lease terms. Seems like a winner.
Now the real work/planning starts. Help.
No, not that move. That's for another day.
I've been happily using Flickr to house my photos for about a year and a half. It was a slow ramp up process, but as I got more into photography it's become a very large part of my process. That's about the change.
I've watched Zooomr since a bit before it's beta 2.0 launch last July. At some point I signed up for a free account and promptly did nothing with it. Seriously, the last time I logged in was June 19, 2006. I've been a total slacker. But as Flickr has been working to limit and change for the worse, Zooomr is working to expand and change for the better.
Zooomr, I hope you live up to my expectations. Otherwise the next stop is me having to build something myself. And well, no one wants that.
UPDATE: I submitted this photo to JPG Magazine today (2/16/07) for their Suicide Girls' sponsored theme. Go vote for it!


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on Truer words were never spoken